VivianTo Whom It May Concern
September 14th 2007 12:41
Today I am the girl I always wanted to be. The most wonderful part is: I trust that girl to handle everything in her life with honesty and bravery.
This feeling hasn't exist even a couple of years ago.
But let me start where it all begins: The moment I was born, 23 years, 33 days and 4 hours ago...
When I was born, I was loved - for different reasons, but at least I was loved. I guess the main problem was that my parents did not love each other. So it came that on the day I was welcomed to this world, my father showed up drunk in the hospital. I do not know what happened next, but neither my mom nor probably I were particularly impressed.
Sometimes I wonder if that one impression, my first impression ever of my father, shaped my life-long relationship with him. Maybe my innocent baby-conscious inhaled his alcohol breath and somewhere in my brain the "father-daughter- gene" was badly and negatively affected. ERROR...
I do not think though that it is true, however, I wonder then how much this saying really means:
"You never get a second chance to make your first impression". And to be honest, he never took a second chance, eventhough I offered it to him.
Being myself now, I dare to say that he also does not deserve a second chance anymore. Fighting, neglecting, abusing, refusing help...all that does not derserve another chance. It has been done, you cannot take it back.
However, there has to be the point, when I should forgive him...well, I am still working on that...
This feeling hasn't exist even a couple of years ago.
But let me start where it all begins: The moment I was born, 23 years, 33 days and 4 hours ago...
When I was born, I was loved - for different reasons, but at least I was loved. I guess the main problem was that my parents did not love each other. So it came that on the day I was welcomed to this world, my father showed up drunk in the hospital. I do not know what happened next, but neither my mom nor probably I were particularly impressed.
I do not think though that it is true, however, I wonder then how much this saying really means:
"You never get a second chance to make your first impression". And to be honest, he never took a second chance, eventhough I offered it to him.
Being myself now, I dare to say that he also does not deserve a second chance anymore. Fighting, neglecting, abusing, refusing help...all that does not derserve another chance. It has been done, you cannot take it back.
However, there has to be the point, when I should forgive him...well, I am still working on that...
| 253 |
| Vote |
Add To: 
subscribe to this blog
Comment by Harry
Sydney Diary
Personals
Brisbane Diarystar
Zoo Parent