VivianHow to complain-effectively
September 28th 2007 19:59
How to complain – effectively
One other thing I learned from my father was, how to complain. He complained about everything, tiny or big, it did not matter. Very funny though, he did it very effectively. He would get what he wanted and even got more of what he not wanted, just to complain again. So here I am still in diapers, learning how to get what I want from the master itself.
You don’t wanna carry me home (arms full of grocery-bags, struggeling to make it to the next bus station), fine I look for the next cold winter puddle and sit right into it and won’t move until you pick me up and carry me home. You wanna feet me spinach? Fine I start crying with this annoying high-pitch voice and if that doesn’t help, I just throw the plate against the next wall, painting the room in a lovely dirty green.
Well, what a trouble child. That kid might need some anger management in its later years. WRONG! This kid knows what it wants.
However, sitting into the nearest puddle if you got the wrong dish served in a restaurant won’t bother anyone, except for you, because you are 32 years old and will now certainly lie in bed with a bladder infection. Plus you do look ridiculous sitting there all sulky and childish.
There is a better option. Complain-effectively (my friends will confirm that I am not happy if I can’t complain and that most people are a bit terrified when I start being a quite straight-forward and forceful negotiator. Might just be, they are terrified, because I am German. But I like to believe that is, because I know how to get things straight
).
Here we go:
Don’t be too personal. It doesn’t do you any good if you just blame the person who is closest to you. It might not even be there fault. Most likely in a big company the person you are complaining to had nothing to do with the actual error made. So, don’t kill the messenger!
Avoid phases like “you have done this and that wrong”, try to be a bit more calm with passive phrases like “there has been a mix-up” or “I am a bit confused, I think a mistake has been made”.
Secondly, don’t be harsh or impolite, no matter how angry you are. If you start shouting or using words like “I want immediately” or “you must do this and that now”, people will get defensive and your complaint won’t go very far. Be polite, let them know that you understand their situation, but also don’t forget to make clear that you are right (if you are) and that you won’t beg off. Eventually your aim is to get the mistake corrected and that to you benefit.
Don’t worry, if you follow those rules, you will see soon that people will offer you a great deal to make up for their mistakes J.
To show them that you are in control, make sure you smile and use phrases like “there seems to have been a mistake”, “would you mind checking it for me”, “I was hoping to sort this out”, “I understand what you mean, however…”
Are we good until here? I think that will do it, however if you are still not satisfied, be a bit more forceful and show them that you will go all the nine yards if neccessary. Ask to speak to their manager or supervisior.
Well, if your friend works for the local newspaper or radio station and you have the connection you might as well mention it, I am sure that always helps
For extreme case, contact me, I am sure I can get you a great dealJ J
One other thing I learned from my father was, how to complain. He complained about everything, tiny or big, it did not matter. Very funny though, he did it very effectively. He would get what he wanted and even got more of what he not wanted, just to complain again. So here I am still in diapers, learning how to get what I want from the master itself.
You don’t wanna carry me home (arms full of grocery-bags, struggeling to make it to the next bus station), fine I look for the next cold winter puddle and sit right into it and won’t move until you pick me up and carry me home. You wanna feet me spinach? Fine I start crying with this annoying high-pitch voice and if that doesn’t help, I just throw the plate against the next wall, painting the room in a lovely dirty green.
However, sitting into the nearest puddle if you got the wrong dish served in a restaurant won’t bother anyone, except for you, because you are 32 years old and will now certainly lie in bed with a bladder infection. Plus you do look ridiculous sitting there all sulky and childish.
There is a better option. Complain-effectively (my friends will confirm that I am not happy if I can’t complain and that most people are a bit terrified when I start being a quite straight-forward and forceful negotiator. Might just be, they are terrified, because I am German. But I like to believe that is, because I know how to get things straight
).Here we go:
Don’t be too personal. It doesn’t do you any good if you just blame the person who is closest to you. It might not even be there fault. Most likely in a big company the person you are complaining to had nothing to do with the actual error made. So, don’t kill the messenger!
Secondly, don’t be harsh or impolite, no matter how angry you are. If you start shouting or using words like “I want immediately” or “you must do this and that now”, people will get defensive and your complaint won’t go very far. Be polite, let them know that you understand their situation, but also don’t forget to make clear that you are right (if you are) and that you won’t beg off. Eventually your aim is to get the mistake corrected and that to you benefit.
Don’t worry, if you follow those rules, you will see soon that people will offer you a great deal to make up for their mistakes J.
To show them that you are in control, make sure you smile and use phrases like “there seems to have been a mistake”, “would you mind checking it for me”, “I was hoping to sort this out”, “I understand what you mean, however…”
Are we good until here? I think that will do it, however if you are still not satisfied, be a bit more forceful and show them that you will go all the nine yards if neccessary. Ask to speak to their manager or supervisior.
Well, if your friend works for the local newspaper or radio station and you have the connection you might as well mention it, I am sure that always helps
For extreme case, contact me, I am sure I can get you a great dealJ J
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